I have been turning over the idea of training for another marathon for months now. I've kept my weekly mileage up fairly well since October, but it's that time where I need to make a decision. To commit or not to commit? Either increase the mileage or don't. The problem is, I'm just plain bored. I don't like running alone. I miss running with my husband. I hate running in the snow and/or rain. I dislike running into the wind. I get separation anxiety every time I get serious about picking up the phone and calling a babysitter.
This is of course, all of my own making. While I can't do anything about the weather, I do know people that run. I could contact them. I could meet up with them. I could chat while I run. I could punch in the numbers and call the young lady I know would be a fabulous babysitter. I have the ability to solve my problem.
Here's the kicker: I like being able to wake up whenever on a Saturday morning, jet out my front door, know exactly where and how far I'm going and be back at my front door at a set time. I like not having to drive somewhere to run. I like not having to speed up or slow down for someone. I like being in shape. I love the freedom I feel, even in the wet weather. I love not having to worry about the boys and knowing they are with their Dad. So, it doesn't seem too bad until I am actually out there, running through the puddles and having that conversation with myself at mile 10, convincing myself to just run home and join in the warm, lively pancake breakfast happening at our dining room table.
I do everything I can to find motivation and inspiration from my surroundings. I love running along the Columbia River and taking part in the regular routines. The fisherman and hunters know me-they may not know my name, but they know me. They love to know how long I'm running that day. They love to say I'm crazy. Even though I don't know the residents, I feel like I'm in the Midwest again, waving to every passerby. I enjoy looking for seals, sea lions and otters. I enjoy checking on the progress of the osprey nests. I love saying good morning to the llamas, cows, ponies and donkeys that greet me along the way. And for the record, I actually say it out loud, Good morning, Mr. Donkey! I look for rainbows whenever I can.
This past Saturday, I could not manage to find one rainbow, not one silver lining in 15 miles of drizzling, cold rain. I could not find one good reason to run. I came home dejected and wondering out loud whether I could do this by myself. When I walked in the door, Daddy O handed me a card addressed to myself that he had found in the mailbox. Here is what was inside:
Thanks Cousin S, for this rainbow. I didn't know that a person could send one via USPS, but you did. I needed this. I just managed to run 7 miles in the pouring rain before dinner tonight thinking of this sticker. I was light on my feet and happy to be outside. I didn't need to look for inspiration this afternoon, because just thinking of this made me giggle for the entire run. It's on my nightstand for now, I'm waiting for a dry day to apply it to my car. Wish we lived closer, I think we'd make a good Saturday morning running pair.
Love your honesty and this was very inspirational for me. Especially when I got to the last paragraph. That would have made me want to go too. So happy you have a neat cousin like that. See how many people look up to you,:) including me.
ReplyDeleteSticker update: Today was clear and dry, so I was able to stick it to the back window of my vehicle. After helping Boy O read it, he scrunched up his face and said, "you're not bad Mommy-don't put that on your car, you are a good runner and a good mommy."
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh, and I tried hard to explain that it was a joke. I don't think he got it, but it's on my car anyway!